Email Correspondence Circa 2004
From: Cristina Regep
To: Jones Brixton
Date: 28/8/2004
One entry? i dont usually wite entries about the same thing. pansy, i lied to you so i wouldnt have to tell the truth. some things were hard for me to understand and handle, even now there are things i dont say, but they are things i wouldnt say to myself…If i’d hurt you a long the way, im sorry, but the past is a shadow at most. I got myself within odd situations, i’d made someone believe i loved them, that i wanted to marry them, simply because of my own mind being fogged at the time – i dont even blame scott, he only turned bad when i turned around one day and said “i dont actually love you at all and id prefe it if you left me a lone” – it was true, i didnt love them, and because i had never truly loved anyone in the past, i found it hard to understand why he was so upset. an idiot though he is.
Trust me, and im sure you know, im as imperfect as the ord allows, but im not fake and thats something ive never been, not towards you anyway.
regardless, i hope we stay friends throughout the years…you dont need to know every fragment of my past to be a friend, and you dont have to think im an illusion unless it makes you feel better.
i always was who i said i was, minus a few elements. aight?
From: Jones Brixton
To: Cristina Regep
Date: 28/4/2004
>hmm i was drunk when i read that email last night. now i’m hung over and it
>still confuses me. go figure.
>i’ll talk to you about this some other time.
From: Cristina Regep
To: Jones Brixton
Date: 30/4/2004
you’re weird. seriously. i dont know what you’re cut about. i never lied to you about anything important, not even semi important. you’re cut up about what exactly? that i didnt go into detail? or that i didnt mention the mistakes i’d made in regards to scott etc because yeah i was clouded in my own fog but hey, thats something a lot of people are guilty of at some bad stage in their life.
You sometimes get on this high horse as though youve never had a bad period in your life when you wanted to block out, or at least not talk about..stuff. If you can’t relate to that then im pretty glad because its not really something i’d wish upon people. But hey, i saw the error, i
apologised, if you can’t accept that and still insist on my fakeness, when the only thing i was fake about is the shit i left out, then kudos to you
From: Jones Brixton
To: Cristina Regep
Date: 30/4/2004
>i’m not cut up. i was confused. and drunk. being confused isn’t the same as
>being cut up. in fact, they’re rather different.
>anyway, you can lie all you want. i don’t mind.
From: Cristina Regep
To: Jones Brixton
Date: 30/4/2004
no offense to you, and im sure that due to the thickness of your skin you wouldnt take it as offense anyway, but even if i had lied to you constantly about everything, even if i’d told you i was the princess of norway and i owned 400 hot air balloons, you still wouldnt deserve as much as my spit on your face. Has anyone told you youre pompously annoying? An infantile mind who thinks to much of himself and his feelings? a shell of a human who hides behind some facade bigger than any i ever created. I mean ok, when i met you i thought you were ‘ok’, at one stage i liked you, that passed and i thought “hey youve known someone for this long, might as well stay friends’…but youre the type of person that sees everything in light of how it affects him. And i only thought kids thought the world revolved around them.
In all honestly, i dont really give a flying pigs tendon if i ever see your name or not, its just sad to be called a lier by someone who is as hopeless as you. To be honest, if i was covered in shit, lost both my legs, had a spear through my right ear and dog snot on my lip, i’d still be a league higher than you. anyway, see ya, take care, and thanks for putting a fast track on it.
