Nuzzle in a juicy double.
From the monthly archives:
Friday. Precinct. Standing by the bar outside talking to Aster.
“Yeah man, it was insane,” I said. “She started cracking onto a lesbian in front of her ex-girlfriend, then we went to the Evelyn and she got in a fight with some chick.”
“Sounds like you had a fun night.”
A girl walked over from [...]
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Some times, I think about how cool it would be to go back to my hometown, find all the girls that I didn’t have a chance with in high school, and fuck them.
I ran into this dude I always see out clubbing. Full natural dude.
“There’s this chick I went to high school with. [...]
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Who is the hottest, sexiest, brilliantest, awesomest, talentedest, up-and-comingest guy in the entire universe right now?
If you guessed me, you’re almost right. The correct answer is Arthur Kade.
“Who?” I hear you ask from the peanut gallery. Arthur Motherfucking Kade, you dimwit, I reply. You need to pay attention to what you’re reading.
Arthur [...]
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It’s a book about a door-to-door salesman trying to get laid.
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“Hello. Landmark Education. This is Alexia, how may I help you?”
“Hi Alexia, how are you?”
“Good. How are you?”
“Good. My name is Jones Brixton. I’m registered to do the Landmark Forum advanced course next weekend, and I want a refund.”
“Ochay, sure,” there was some sounds of clambering with the phone. “So [...]
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Sitting in Hollywood Hostel, watching TV. An ad comes on.
“I used to have serious problems with asthma. It would stop me doing all the fun things I wanted in life. Every time I wanted to go for a jog or a swim with my friends, I would have to make excuses and [...]
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“I don’t know – there was something not right about it. It was like she was humouring me,” I said as we walked off Hollywood Boulevard.
“Maybe that’s it,” said Aster, as we walked past a kid’s birthday party with a jumping castle in the front yard.
“I wish – that is one helluva party.”
We got [...]
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It’s ten inches long, two inches wide, hard, black… and performs millions of calculations per second.
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